stage fright ?!?

Finally the project for the internship was completed and it was my BIG day today, the presenting..! the only thing i didnt do was in fact pee in my pants.. train me on a dance routine and throw me on stage i'll be fine, but presentations gives me creeps.. i was scared to the bone since the presenting was to be in front of the work people who are thousand times smarter than I am and they are geniuss!!!! few minutes before all I wanted to do was dig a hole and bury myself.. yes yes, i know i'm only the little intern and i'm allowed to make mistakes and they won't laugh at me etc etc. but omg the stage fright (or whatever one may call it) was insane.. I remembered what I was told many moons ago when I performed on the stage, 'practice makes you perfect' and I did practice couple of times by myself for an imaginary audience and yes it almost made me perfect but not quite... All in all I think I did alright, better than I expected myself. I can pat myself and say 'hey you did a good job (even though you almost peeed in your pants - but that's OK)'. The presentation ended up in a conversation between the audience and yours truly, and by the end of it I did know what I was talking about (surprise!).

It was a great experience working here.. it will surely be missed..

Few months left for yet another even bigger presentation... not looking forward but yet looking forward for the grand finale..

on the streets..

homeless people live everywhere and almost every part of the world regardless of whether it's a third world country or a developed country. which i found quite amusing or rather interesting at first coz when you live in sri lanka you'd think that in a developed country people would want to work hard or rather they earn money somehow and things are almost given to them compared to a country like our lil ol' sri lanka where it's 3rd world. for some obvious reasons and others not, i do not feel that much sympathy for the homeless in these developed countries, which has become a growing and a continuous problem. such homelessness has lead to drugs, mj etc. and they were given new injectors for their drug consumption. how pathetic and sad is that? in a way that is actually good as it limits the various transmitted diseases, but on the other hand this inevitably bumps up the number of people who are using drugs on streets and leads to the number of homeless people. it's sad why these people cannot go find a minimum wage job at least and rent a tiny place and live a happy life, when they live in paradise compared to how people live in 3rd world countries with no water, food, or better yet surrounded by deserts.. There are many reasons why these people have been living in streets, but if one wants to get out of it there are enough and plenty of ways to do so. all one needs is some courage..

traditions - like it or not...

hmmmm.. are we bound to abide by them or follow them.. isnt it one's own choice.. people have their own opinion in following traditions and i believe everyone's allowed or entitled to their own opinion whether it's commonly accepted or not. especially family traditions when it comes to special occasions, weddings etc etc. isnt it the couple's and their parents opinions what matters or do we have to listen and do what the extended family, aunties, granmas' want.. i found it interesting how sri lankans including myself sometimes or most of the times worry or think too much about what people around us or our family think about our actions regardless of how big of an impact the action has.. having lived by myself on the other side of the world since my teens i believe i think at least a bit differently but the sri lankan-ness in me always pops out and kills the rebel in me ..

i should stop now since i'm not making any sense.. here's hoping to write more on this later...

twists and turns I

three months have gone by.. rather three and half months, as an intern in a field that i initially wanted to be in but two-three years down the road i almost hate it with a passion. the greatest experience i got being an intern and it didn't take long for me to fathom that this isn't what i would enjoy doing.

has this happened to anyone or is it only me who feel the pain and the agony of being or better yet forced to be in a field that I don't enjoy and hate to move forward by learning.. it'd make me feel better if such confusion is commonly seen or felt amongst us..

life takes twists and turns and and i'd hate to do or be in a career that i wont enjoy. that won't do any good to me nor to my colleagues nor the company that i'd work in.. while i patiently wait and look forward to where my life takes me in this long hard curvy road, my heart still cries out for the long lost (or yet to be found) something in my life..

proposal

just as I thought I'm doing my final project the semester after next, it only took me less than half an hour to change my mind to doing the final project the coming semester. and soon i realise that i'm a tad late to submit a project proposal which is supposed to be submitted two weeks prior to first week/day of classes, and yesterday was THE DAY or rather the deadline, for proposal submission.

An email this way and one the other way saves me from being kicked out of the final project class! voila i get a reply back with an extension but no date on email. 3/4 of pages of pleading and excuses of all kinds and two lines of 'alright keep working on it'. what do i assume as the deadline hmmm i wonder... haha

i was thinking more like i could stay 'til the monday of next week but nooo.. the student in me wont budge at least a bit, and forces me to start on the proposal. and there i was proposing last night, wrote a whole load of garbage courtesy of mr.gates. I think i'm done with it.. two pages of garbage isnt all that bad, when you think of the big ass project I gotta finish at the end of the semester..

good luck to me!

whispering a hello to the blogsphere..

Hello world..?

needless to say I'm new to the blogsphere and obviously to the sri lankan blogsphere which I often roam and wander around during my spare time (?!?!).. when i read others' blogs i often had thoughts pouring in to my head thinking ahhuhh i could write about this/that etc etc. but now when i became a proud owner of a tiny little blog nothing comes in to mind to write, to even name my first post to start with.. hence it's the very generic hello my fellow bloggers..

alrighty.. enough of mumbling or not making any sense at all..

hello to everyone..