fogged

fogged beyond belief..

couldn't see two steps ahead

wishing it can be fast forwarded..

or rewound perhaps?

skip this phase all together..

a far cry

a lot of the people I grew up with including me.. we live far far away from home.. all over the world, across continents. Haven't seen each other for god knows how long and a random hi/hello on messenger or facebook is all there is. or better yet the happy birthday wishes on facebook, that too is thanks to the auto reminder application.. anywhoo, it shows we are there, alive and well.. and we still care..

everyone including myself, is always grumbly and nostalgic about leaving sri lanka and only going there for few weeks a year, that too if you are lucky.. and how we miss the food, the sandy beach, the hot weather.. and everything that we leave behind.

this got me thinking, that yearning we have, that longing to go to the land we can say we truly belong.. what is it.. do we only say it because we know we have an alternative? because we know that no matter how short/long the vacation is, we'll go back to the western world at the end.. that we almost call home now? only coz there's no abundance of pilawoos kottu around the big cities we live in? I question myself, what would I have felt if I had no other option but was in sri lanka, and didn't know the difference of being away.. would I be sitting at home thinking why am I here? or would I be a happy poppy..

now I'm far from home.. counting days to go back..

sitting here thinking wtf am I doing here..

with a little in mind

at night as i switch off the lights and decide to close my eyes in the hopes of sleep, only then thoughts come pouring to my mind with endless words to write..

then i'm too lazy to start writing or typing rather. come morning all's gone...

looks sterile, but is it clean. i think not.. makes it harder to put my thoughts in to words..

may be i should just shake it off in the wee hours and garbage the thoughts of waking up in the morning in time to work, and write whatever runs through my head..

one day, i'll look back to see this is what ran through my head.. long long time ago..

waiting game

this end of the stick
endlessly chewy
light at the end
seems way too far
if at all

it's all a waiting game.. is it..

from your lips she drew...

the hallelujah...

saved many from week to week. loved Jason Castro's dreamy version. and Tim`s version this year wasn't too shabby either.

that song is quite a mind fuck for me, and leaves me funked up every time i listen to it.. nostalgia.. memories.. every single time. and ended up forcing me to stop watching my weekly tv shows and blog something. my Friday night babies..

Leonard Cohen, what were you thinking when you were writing the song..

brilliant.. just brilliant..

the feng shui-ness

i had some family over during the last couple of weeks staying at my place until they get settled and what not. they aren't my immediate family, but very close and i was more than happy to play host, even though i barely walked to the kitchen during their stay.. may be just to make my morning tea, and that was it. courtesy of auntie i got all meals covered, including work lunch. yummy sri lankan food.

it's only when you live with people for a little while you realize how different they do things around the house, their customs.. ways of living etc etc. even though you are pretty much from the same family. so, i took them to a furniture store to purchase beds for them, they pick one, checked prices etc. all happy and okay move on to picking mattresses.. and oh all of a sudden that bed is no good. me being me who can't keep my mouth shut, as if it's my money, had to ask why the change of mind. apparently that bed has wooden pieces that are vertical on the headboard?!? and it's a big 'no no' according to feng shui? wtf? are you for real.. roomie and I looked at each other, smirked, giggled, exchanged our own little expressions, and move on sure whatever.. so we are back to square one. but somehow managed to leave the store with some success.

I honestly do not have anything against people who follow whatever floats their boat.. but dude you shouldn't close your washroom door because feng shui says so? ayyoo.. now I wasn't joking about that one either.

I'm yet to find out what this is, pardon my ignorance.. may be it brings positive things to your life.. i wish, just may be! off I go googling away my new found feng shui..

spam-a-lot

so apparently this looks to be quite common around here.. I get random spammy comments on almost every blog post. It's getting annoying, and rather time consuming to delete and then delete forever? jeezz.. about viagra and acai berry pills and how good your writing's become?!?!.. what the hell is that?

grump!

and oh yeah, many of my msn chat contacts have stupidly or willingly clicked on those random spam virus bs, and every time they log on I get those too. Annoooyyiiinnnnggg! how silly can you be to click on 'check this acai berry pill to get thin, or I saw your naked pictures ohh la la, oh my panties are in a bunch, come fix them' wooott??..

way too click happy for my taste..

and so it is..

i dreamt of you
weird it felt..
it's been years
but feels decades

i yearn for you
and ache for you

what used to be hot and sunny
warm and sandy..
now cold and windy..

through all this.. the thought of you make me smile..